Dearest Readers,
Yesterday, on the Northend of Outre Island, a small child became bewildered by the appearance of an animal that had previously gone undiscovered. The boy, named Delmonte, happened upon the creature as he retrieved his Sunday bonnet, which had blown off his head and into a nearby shrub. According to the child, upon his entering the bush, a bulbous figure became startled and ran away. "The creature had many unusual qualities," explained Delmonte "one being his tail, which, oddly enough, was located on the front of his body."

Dearest Readers,
This past weekend saw a flurry of activity on the lawn of city hall. Our own Mayor, Martin Suckle, hosted a swan roast to raise money for the completion of a children's petting zoo in the downtown area. Those in attendance claimed they had never seen such a gigantic swan in their lives. Some found the effect disturbing. "It was as if a little man in a swan outfit was being cooked slowly for maximum flavor" noted one very, very elderly gentleman. "He was juicy and delicious," he added late the next day.
Amongst those in attendance were singer/songwriter Fluff, who kicked off the proceedings with a ballad about how children should not trust their own instincts in public. He followed that with a 20 minute diatribe about how difficult and emotional it is to write and perform music, afterwhich he could not stop crying and had to be carried away by a woman police officer. He was not charged with any crime.
On the whole, Mayor Martin Suckle said he was pleased with the event's success. "We had such an incredible turnout here today," he mumbled in frustration, "and we forgot to charge admission."

Dearest Blognaughts,
It has come to our attention (via the eye and the brain) that not all of you might know what, where and who Outre Island...are. Here, therefore is a brief summary of our inception, as printed in The History of Us, Rumson, Cooper, Eddie & Sons, 1962.

Outre Island is located thousands of miles from where you are right now. It was founded accidently by one Mr. Graham Suckle, an explorer of no fixed abode. He decided to name the island after his beautiful wife, Outre, the daughter of three French fishermen. Together Graham and his bride excavated the midnight mines of desire and quickly gave way to over 35 bouncing children. Today, Outre Island is a thriving city/island, rich in natural resources and overflowing with pride.

Dear Friends,
From hence forward, The Outre Island Daily shall report occurances from our island both major and minor in scale. We shall attempt to be concise in our coverage of events on Outre Island, limiting the news to what is important and not merely humiliating. At times we shall appear to be unsure of ourselves and perhaps even a little shy. Do not despair. It is our way of showing our intense insecurity concerning our ability to write and understand ideas. Please feel free to pass this on to your trusted friends and neighbors. We look forward to sharing informations with you.

Wayne Nancy, Editor-in-Chief

Delmonte